We all enjoy having friends. Having people to spend time with, giving advice, having each others backs , and shoulders to cry on is a good feeling. But what if that friend turns out to be toxic? now, we all display toxic behaviors from time to time, but we all have that one friend who takes it to a whole other level. The thing about toxic friends is that they come in all shapes and sizes, and are sometimes hard to spot. But the negative effects of one will poison your life
The dirty truth: some friendships-like relationships, or jobs, or hobbies-simply have an expiration date. We outgrow friends for all kinds of reasons: priorities change, social circle shift- we've all been there. A toxic friend treads lightly until they find out more about you, and when they do they begin to verbally attack or manipulate. They are a lot like ticks; they get under your skin and inject us with their poison. Then sometimes a realization hits like it did for me. You examine a friendship and acknowledge the things you already know.
The dirty truth: some friendships-like relationships, or jobs, or hobbies-simply have an expiration date. We outgrow friends for all kinds of reasons: priorities change, social circle shift- we've all been there. A toxic friend treads lightly until they find out more about you, and when they do they begin to verbally attack or manipulate. They are a lot like ticks; they get under your skin and inject us with their poison. Then sometimes a realization hits like it did for me. You examine a friendship and acknowledge the things you already know.
1. They look for flaws in every person that they meet. Everything they feel, think and sees is associate
with negative emotions.
2. They always have a catty comeback for everything you say.
3. You often find yourself saying "but we've know each other forever…" to justify keeping the
relationship alive.
4. They're never at fault for anything. They hurt you and then pretend that they had "no idea" what they
did was going to make you upset.
5. They pretend to support/like/be happy for you when they're with you, but behind your back it's a
whole other story. Even when they're "being nice" there's always some sort of catty kicker.
6. They're never truly happy for other people because they want what they have. And if they can't have
something, no one can.
7. They're always complaining, they never see the bright side, and they put you and other people down
constantly by continuing a toxic friendship, you're allowing your friend to hurt you, but you're also
hurting yourself. Good friendships are relationships that make both people feel good about
themselves and feel natural.
8. They rely on you to make them happy. Making them happy is not your responsibility. We do have
our down times and we seek comfort and love from our friends, but friends who make you feel that
you are responsible for making them happy all the time?! Uh, thats toxic!
9. They put you down and expect you to pick them up, or drain the life right out of you for their own
gain. With toxic friends like these, who needs enemies.
with negative emotions.
2. They always have a catty comeback for everything you say.
3. You often find yourself saying "but we've know each other forever…" to justify keeping the
relationship alive.
4. They're never at fault for anything. They hurt you and then pretend that they had "no idea" what they
did was going to make you upset.
5. They pretend to support/like/be happy for you when they're with you, but behind your back it's a
whole other story. Even when they're "being nice" there's always some sort of catty kicker.
6. They're never truly happy for other people because they want what they have. And if they can't have
something, no one can.
7. They're always complaining, they never see the bright side, and they put you and other people down
constantly by continuing a toxic friendship, you're allowing your friend to hurt you, but you're also
hurting yourself. Good friendships are relationships that make both people feel good about
themselves and feel natural.
8. They rely on you to make them happy. Making them happy is not your responsibility. We do have
our down times and we seek comfort and love from our friends, but friends who make you feel that
you are responsible for making them happy all the time?! Uh, thats toxic!
9. They put you down and expect you to pick them up, or drain the life right out of you for their own
gain. With toxic friends like these, who needs enemies.
For those who haven't experienced this… CONGRATULATIONS! You have been saved from a life chapter of stress and mess.
When a friendship is so toxic that it's sucking the life and goodness out of you, I think more drastic measures are necessary. As we grow, our time becomes increasingly valuable and we can no longer afford to frivolously spend our time with toxic friends. Walk away and stay away. This doesn't mean that you don't love or care about the person anymore. It means that you have more self respect for yourself. You can change yourself, but you cannot change another.
When a friendship is so toxic that it's sucking the life and goodness out of you, I think more drastic measures are necessary. As we grow, our time becomes increasingly valuable and we can no longer afford to frivolously spend our time with toxic friends. Walk away and stay away. This doesn't mean that you don't love or care about the person anymore. It means that you have more self respect for yourself. You can change yourself, but you cannot change another.
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