IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP IN TROUBLE?

In every relationship there are up and downs, but a good relationships should be healthy, with respect for each other, full of laughter, kindness and honesty. There's nothing wrong with arguing, all couples do, but for a healthy relationship to exist, there have to be a component of freedom.

Lets face it: your relationship isn't what it used to be. You've gone from having butterflies in your stomach whenever you're with your special someone to feeling dread when that someone walks in the door. If you're wondering whether your relationship is going through a rough patch, or if it's time to say goodbye, then see if these points apply to you.

Distance- You remember the times he used to be very attentive. He used to call, text, Facetime, or email you and now…crickets. You have to initiate all text and calls because he's not doing it. This is usually a pretty clear sign that he doesn't care the way he did anymore.

You're Snooping Away- If you're glancing at his phone, hacking into his emails, or going through his pockets, it's because you're looking for evidence of what you might already know or your trust level is nonexistent. There has to be a high level of trust for any relationship to work. Both people need to know that when they aren't together, they don't have to worry about what the other person is up to. If you find yourself always wondering if your partner is being true, then that will be a huge hurdle for your relationship to overcome. Likewise, if your partner refuses to trust you even though you have given him or her no reason to doubt you, that's another sign that the relationship isn't headed in a promising direction.

You're Not Doing It- It's natural for every relationship to lose some of its passion after a while, but if you've been in a dry spell for what feels like forever and don't even want sex, then it may be a sign of larger things that are lacking in your relationship. It seems like you're friend with out the benefit, and the sad part is you don't even really care.

You Don't Find The Need To Dress Up Anymore- Putting in the effort to look and feel sexy says that you are invested in your relationship. Maintaining a relationship is work.

No Time Together- There will be times when you'll spend time with family and friends, but if your significant other is  repeatedly choosing to spend more time with his or her friends than with you, it could be a warning sign. When all kinds of distraction continually pull your partner away, there's a good chance that those distractions have become more important in your partner's mind than you are.

Not Feeling Supported- Constant or even frequent criticism is one of the most obvious signs that a relationship is in trouble. It can really wear you down to hear over and over again that you should avoid making a certain type of joke, or act a certain way when you're with a certain group of friends And it's just as hard on a relationship. Constant criticism is often a sign of underlying anger or insecurity-neither of which makes a relationship work well.

Fight- You fight more often than before. Though fighting can occasionally be a healthy and productive way to communicate and resolve conflict, if you feel like you spend half of your time with your significant other engaged in fights that don't go anywhere, then it may be a sign that your relationship is over. If you're fighting just for the sake of fighting, or if fighting is the only way to communicate, then your relationship may be reaching its expiration date. 

Failure To Communicate- Relationships are all about communicating your needs and understanding the needs and feelings of the person you're with. If you feel like your significant other doesn't understand your feelings, and you have little idea what is going on in your partners life, then your relationship is on the rocks. 

Unfaithfulness- Many relationships have survived infidelity, but if it becomes routine for one or both of you, or if there was infidelity that one of you can't get over, then it may be time to end the relationship. If both people can't agree to be monogamous, then it will be impossible to make your relationship work.

Talk to your partner about what is bothering you. Take time to think about it before beginning the discussion, perhaps writing in a journal to organize your thoughts. Before you begin the conversation, make sure you are both calm and open to talk about your relationship.

If two or three of the items in this list apply to you and your partner, there may not be anything to really worry about it. You should still explore that facet of your relationship and see if you can strengthen the bond you share. But as noted before, even the best relationships struggle from time to time.

If you read through the 9 signs in this article and found yourself relating to these issues much more than you'd like, then this is a good time to give some serious thought to the question of whether this a relationship into which you want to invest so much of your time, mind, and heart.

It's time to come to terms with the reality of where your relationship is, and break the deal before it breaks you.